A comment thread on Peter Rozovsky's site Detectives Beyond Borders has finally driven me to take action about something that's been bothering me since my move to Australia. Bagels. Here in Melbourne they are sold by a man called Mr. Glick who foists a baked roll with a hole in the middle of it on an unsuspecting populace. Mr. Glick is a master of the challah, but his bagels are an insult to the name. They have no density or chewiness or crunchiness or any of the qualities that make up a decent H&H or Zabar's NY style bagel. They are imposters, frauds, sorry excuses even for a roll. I haven't wanted to rock the boat since I moved here, but I have been silent too long. As Edmund Burke famously said "all it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing." Mr Glick (or Glicks Junior) if you can't make a decent bagel please stop selling those cheap knockoff ones which sully the name of a fine food. As my old grandmother never used to say: "Dershtikt zolstu veren!"