But let's not make it tomorrow morning and how about instead of 56th and Wabasha we try 83 Botanic Avenue, Belfast? Ok? What's at 83 Botanic I hear you ask? Why, No Alibis bookshop of course. I just got the good word from those fine people at Serpents Tail that I'll be there on Wednesday July 8 at 6:30 pm for the British and Irish launch of Fifty Grand. No Alibis is one of the great bookshops of the world, but there's a big problem reading there these days. Dave Torrans. Mr Torrans, NA's host with the most, has now become more famous than a good number of his guest readers because of the success of the brilliant new Colin Bateman novel Mystery Man. MM is being turned into a TV film by the BBC and is a Richard and Judy Book Club pick (for American readers think Regis and Kelly, but Richard as Kelly). The book begins in No Alibis and much of the early going is centred around the shop. Further spoilers would, er, spoil it but I found it to be absolutely hilarious. Already famous from his appearances on BBC radio Torrans is on the verge of superstardom and when he plays a version of himself in the film, he'll be impossible. But please, if you are going to come to the reading, say hi to me too. I'll be the jetlagged one that isn't bald....
Want another reason to come? Ok. I'll be giving away the annotated American galley of Fifty Grand that I used for the final copyedit. Oh, and there were will be free drink.
89 comments:
Please not July at all! I'm away.
Excellent news, squire ... It is still your round, isn't it?
Cheers, Dec
Excellent, hope to be there. Though I should point out that Mystery Man won't actually be a movie. I'm about to start turning it into a TV script, which might, and I stress might, go on to become a full series. But I've been down this road a dozen times, so I ain't counting no chickens. And frankly impressed that your publishers are bringing you over.
Thanks for the name-drop, pal. I finished Divorcing Jack last week, and it was a laugh a paragraph. I've also added No Alibis to the list of places I have to see before I die. Good luck at the reading, I wish NI were a little closer so the wife and I could swing by.
Miss Witch
I'm afraid July is the most likely time. The only reason I can think that you'll be away for the whole month is a French style urge to be on the Riviera watching those same two guys that are everywhere play that game with the paddles and the rubber ball.
Maybe next time.
Dec
Yes it is my shout. Funny that you would remember that after nearly a year.
Colin
Look this is going to happen whether as a BBC film or a series. It's so funny and its such a killer concept. For the cost of five minutes of bloody Eastenders this could be a quality, kick ass TV series. My only question is whether Jimmy Nesbitt is bald enough yet to play Torrans-esque figure.
Brian
Divorcing Jack is the book that made me want to give up writing. How, I thought, can I ever be as good as this? I still havent come up with a satisfactory answer.
Adrian.
Completely unrelated. Recently picked up Dead I well May be, and just commenced reading The Dead Yard last night. In two words - great stuff. Looking forward to getting stuck right back in tonight. Good luck with 50G. I'm sure it will be a blow out success.
P
wabasha is a ref to what, exactly?
Nah, it's a Swedish beach, Adrian. Bikini needs airing (I wish). Green cake has to be eaten.
(I can manage the first few days of July. Surely you will show your face in England, too, after such a long commute?)
Fantastic! I'll be there.
BTW, got my grubby hands on the Serpent's Tail proof of Fitty G. Looks gorgeous.
gb
I'll be there with my partner.
I haven't posted for ages due to the toad work squatting on my life. In the few spare moments I've had, reading 50G has been my escape. What a fabulous book.
Alan
Ian
Bob Dylan. If you havent got Blood on the Tracks get it now.
Anon
Thanks for that. I appreciate it.
Miss Witch
I've never been to Sweden so I dont know how eccentric it is to go to a Swedish beach in July. Perhaps not so?
I think there will be an England leg.
Ger
Thats great. A pint on me. Thats good about the proof. I'm interested to see how the two chapters 5 compare. One will be considerably shorter than the other for legal reasons.
Alan
Very nice Phil Larkin reference there.
I'll see you there mate.
NoAlibis is such a great name for a bookshop, I wish somebody would be as innovative in India!! Came to your blog via Seana's.
And you are right, Nora is an idiot. Read the first chapter of FIFTY GRAND, and was rushed away by your headlong plunge into violent action.
Sucharita
Wow, I dont think I've ever had anyone comment from India before. Very cool.
I do have a small Indian connection though. I spent a couple of months travelling around northern India in 2000. I loved it. Esp Varanasi, one of the most amazing cities on Earth.
Apologies to anyone who commented on the A Matter of Life and Death post. I've just been sent a cease and desist email because apparently the person who said its in the public domain wasn't telling the whole truth. To be on the safe side I am removing the post. Cowardice? Er, yes. Thats also why the British and American versions of 50G are going to be very different.
Hey, Sucharita! I think that is the first time my blog has worked as this kind of connector. My work here is done. Like Colman, I am finding the blogosphere takes up too much of my time and I must now devote myself to my family, friends of the non-virtual world, and above all my work. Oh, and I forgot to mention my little dog, Inigo.
Wait a minute, I don't have a little dog.
No, really--did you believe me for just a second? I am supposed to be moving and I am still sitting here having a beer and jaunting around the blogosphere instead of doing a single sensible thing, like packing.
Adrian, tell Sucharita about your swim in the Ganges or wherever it was.
I hope anyone who is anywhere near Northern Ireland in July will check out the No Alibis gig for me. If I was anywhere near Europe, I'd go in a heartbeat.
The single book of Colin Bateman's that I've read to date was Divorcing Jack and it is still perplexing to me that I haven't read more because I thought it was so great. But I would't worry about competing with him, Adrian--your styles are very different and comparison doesn't really make a lot of sense. Although actually I'm remembering some trash talking you guys did about each other's communities which was quite amusing, so maybe I should try to stir up the rivalry for my own entertainment.
Seana
Yeah I just remembered that. That was over on Dec's blog wasn't it?
No Brennan's blog. I cant quite recall the context but I'm sure I was triumphant.
Incidentally my mum just told me Dave Torrans sent her a signed copy of Mystery Man, but no one should expect similar freebies, the man is trying to run a business and those Rogaine treatments arent cheap.
The swimming incidence was in Allahabad at the confluence of the Ganges and Jamuna. Actually it was so shallow that I walked along the bottom of the river with my head sticking out.
Yes, I'm sure that you were triumphant and if I ever talk to Colin Bateman I'll tell him the same thing.
That he was, I mean.
Is there some sort of moral superiority prize going here for the title? Because as usual, I don't stand a chance.
Seana
Its from a Dylan song apparently about St Paul, Minn. Interestingly Wabasha does not intersect with
56th street, however it does with
fifth and sixth which may be what Mr. Zimmerman meant.
I will leave a clue somwhere in No Alibis. You must find it within fifteen minutes, or the world blows up.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://www.detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
Peter,
If it's a comb it will never be picked up.
I must thank you publicly for Quite Early One Morning which arrived this afternoon. I'm looking forward to it.
Yep, no combs at No Alibis. Its owner has passed beyond the need for such things. Enjoy the Brookmyre, its air of quiet restraint especially.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://www.detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
I'm sure Nora would love Quite Ugly One Morning.
Adrian: Mr. Dylan is quite often intersecting things which no one previously connected. He does this with musical and cultural items, but also with the universe of things less categorizable. Harking back to the subject of genius, that's a good mark of his.
As soundtrack for Quite Ugly One Morning I'd suggest some vintage Pixies: Broken Face,Gouge Away,Wave of Mutilation,Debaser, This Monkey's Gone to Heaven...
I'm so not taking my car to the 50G launch (provided none of my kids are recovering from chicken pox and a fracture at the same time -- my reason for sobriety at the Bateman launch) so if you want to buy me a whiskey instead of a pint, I'll not complain.
gb
Ger
Do they still do that march thing on the Ormeau Road? Cos if its around the twelfth, we'll need our wits about us. But it could be an event. I remember reading somewhere that Stairway to Heaven debuted for the first time in Belfast at the Ulster Hall while a full scale riot was going on outside.
Peter
Nice pic. Two Peters and a Dave.
Marco
I read pages 1-30 last night. No this is not going to be Nora's thing at all.
Patrick
I do take your point and BD would certainly know St Paul a lot better than I do, still I'm not entirely sure geography is his strong suit.
Congrats to BD on no. 1 on the Billboard Chart. I guess BD is a young genius and an old genius too.
Yeah, I think they still enjoy the festivities there, but I'll guide us to the nearest and safest bar. I'm like a bloodhound when the thirst is on me. Plus I can text my wee brother, who's a student and still has an actual social life. Ah technology.
gb
I modelled my sartorial outlook on Columbo's. But that was in another lifetime, one of toil and blood.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
“Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home”
http://detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
Peter
Can you imagine, say, Justin Timberlake coming up with a line like "I came in from the wilderness, a creature void of form."?
Creature void of content, maybe.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
“Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home”
http://detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
You know, if I saw that Ormeau Road march coming toward me down one street and you guys all coming down another after your pub visit--well, I might be sore pressed to choose my path at that point.
Yeah, they'll be the ones scrubbling in their notebooks. No, wait. That will be me.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://www.detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
Scrubbling is not colorful NI slang. It's just sloppy typing.
Peter
You know what it is slang though - scrubber, which I think means a woman of low repute. My brother tells me that scrub is still naval slang for a scumbag which is interesting because the only two places I've come across the word are Patrick Obrian novels and that that TLC song "No Scrubs"
Scrub is also American sports slang for end-of-the-bench players, mop-up men and lowly substitutes.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
Oh, and Seana, I need to add that I have drunk with both Burke and Brennan, and a more polite set of gentlemen you could not imagine.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
Peter, I'm sure they put on a good face for you.
Especially if you were buying them beer. Or they still had some hope of it.
We split buying duties, in the manner of gentlemen everywhere.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
Okay, Peter, whatever you say.
I might be forgetting something someone has said in this thread already, but who all has listened to Dylan's latest? I'm hearing a lot about it, especially at work, but it's conflicting. I'm not a huge Dylan fan, but I find him and his life journey fascinating. I liked both the recent documentary and the artsy movie they did in the last couple of years absorbing.
Far too late for me!
Any dates for England?
Miss Witch
I think that'll be too late too. I'll be in London the following Thursday.
Bookwitch, can't you just jump on Ryan's Air and pop in at No Alibis for an evening? Your family and friends don't even have to know about it. And you know we won't tell.
Seriously. It sounds like a blast.
Seana - I boycott that Mr Ryan. And I go to Sweden on the 7th, and having returned home just last night, I'm a little past all this hopping. I just think writers should arrange their touring to suit me. Check in advance, and all that.
Adrian - my Son is slowly hunting down your books for my recent birthday. I was met by the Orange one when I got back yesterday, having spent the journey in a River. Hidden, it was.
Well, you're right, of course, Bookwitch. I really don't know why you weren't consulted. But as I'm under the impression that Mr. McKinty is getting a free lift over, it's probably Serpents Tail that needs to get a piece of your mind. Although you might want to wait till Adrian has taken full advantage of their generosity before doing so.
Miss Witch, Seana
Not sure that you're going to be missing that much. I'm liable to be a little punchy. Arriving on Monday afternoon after a 19 hour flight from Melbourne, then another flight to Dublin and then train up to Belfast on Wednesday.
I've already told Ger Brennan that instead of doing a reading as such I may do an interpretive dance of Fifty Grand instead. And this is my thinking sober and after a good night's sleep...
What? I would fly there to see you do 50 Grand as an interpretive dance.
Maybe I can bribe gb to smuggle in a camera.
actually if you want the full story I told Brennan it was going to be a "nude interpretive dance" so he'll need the soft focus lens.
Uh, I'm not sure I did want the full story. But never mind. I'm sure Gerard will make it all very tasteful.
What am I saying? My strong suspicion is that with his sense of artistic integrity, he would only make it much, much worse.
A nude interpretative dance seems a cool idea, but you can't play all the characters yourself. Tell me when it's posted on youtube.
Fook, not sure I'll be able to call in sick to make it over.
In re India, I'm thinking about heading there next year. Was talking to a guy this week who was India last year. Something he said reminded me of your story about swimming under water in the Ganges and he wonderful things you found there.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
In re soft focus, G. Brennan took a picture of Dave Torrans and me at No Alibis to which there should be a link elsewhere in this string. We both look a bit fuzzy around the edges.
Peter
I cant be more serious about this: Dont swim in the Ganges!!! Especially dont swim where I swam at the junction of the Ganges and the Yamuna. I was very lucky not to get cholera or worse. Especially especially do not be tempted to swim anywhere near Varanasi (shudders at the prospect).
We spent just over a month travelling around the north, if you can get a month off thats a perfect amount of time. Wonderful trains of course.
Marco
I cant imagine that it will be a pretty sight. Although I'll be able to do the naked guy in the lake pretty effectively I think.
Adrian, the chap I talked to spent a month in India. He also said: "You will get sick" and "Don't even open your mouth in the shower." He was less sanguine about the trains, but he rhapsodized about the country.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
Peter
You know whats weird? In six weeks in India, neither the missus nor I got sick. I had a large Kingfisher beer and spicy chili with every meal (including breakfast) in an attempt to kill the bugs and actually it may have worked.
Although it was luck alone that saved me after swimming with corpses, dead buffalo and dead dogs.
You know who's very good on India (of course) Mark Twain in his underrated Following the Equator.
-Although I'll be able to do the naked guy in the lake pretty effectively I think.
Well, that's questionable. Wasn't he a 6+ foot giant mass of muscle?
you're pushing it, son. a man can only take so many fat jokes. I cant wait till I move back to middle America where I'll be the skinny dude with the fancy hair cut.
Adrian, I'm reading J. Nehru, The Discovery of India. Tendentious in the extreme, and understandably so, but exciting in its ambition.
Perhaps my informant should have had chile and beer for breakfast. He had Indian food three times a day, which he loved, though he said the trip put him off it for a while.
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/</a
Peter
I visited Nehru's house. Its quite nice. Coincidentally, or not, I havent eaten Indian food for 7 years (since I came back).
Actually let me tell you a real coincidence: I took along A Suitable Boy to read and there's a bit where the characters visit the British cantonment at Lucknow, I reached that very page in the British cantonment at Lucknow, a few feet from the room where the characters went.
I got a bit of an education in Indian food in London -- a restaurant that served some of the same dishes I was familiar with, only with a slightly sweeter, nuttier flavor. Turns out the owners were from the south of India.
And if you wear the same haircut you had in the picture of you with your wife and the guns, do you think the haircut will ever be considered fancy, even in Middle America? (Shudders at the prospect.)
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Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/
Peter
I'm very happy with my haircut and even if I wasnt I wouldnt say anything because I'm slightly afraid of my hipster barber.
Unfortunately we never made it to Southern India which is a real shame because the food as you say is completely different and they all those strange erotic temples.
Hopefully I'll get back there some day though.
Adrian,
You could do the reading as Mercado. Although you'd have to pull a Buffalo Bill a la Silence of the Lambs if it was a nude interpretive dance.
Have fun across the pond, or in your case, across the world. One of these years you and I will share a pint or six.
Brian
I think what the world has been missing is me saying "it puts the lotion on its skin" naked, before a bookstore crowd. Still it wouldnt be the worst reading I've ever had. Maybe not even in the bottom 3.
I'm telling you - guaranteed press, which leads to more sales.
I'm sure if you were to do it in Florence you could inspire a modern Michelangelo to immortalize in marble your classic pose.
Marco
We could call it "Lyrical Prose and Classical Pose."
Are you and gb going to have drinks before or after, because that is going to make all the difference on how much the rest of us are going to enjoy the YouTube demonstration.
I like that Lucknow story, by the way.
Oh, and from Dec's twitter:
"Da Franco's seafood linguini is positively Homeric."
An Irishman who knows how to eat.
Marco
V. nice command of the sarcastic.
Brian
I think Justice Scalia is merely reverting to a national trait.
Seana
It looks like its going to be afterwards which will give me ample opportunity to destroy the tape.
No one can rest with easy heart knowing that all the tapes have been destroyed ever again.
Everybody has a camera phone too now. And not a single shot of a UFO.
I went to a local talent sort of fundraiser last night--talent was mixed, but the M.C. was good. He mentioned the cutbacks afflicting everyone right now.He said that even the CIA had announced cutbacks of 50%, and now we would all be doing our own information gathering and data entry on ourselves, in Facebook.
"I went to a local talent sort of fundraiser last night--talent was mixed, but the M.C. was good. He mentioned the cutbacks afflicting everyone right now.He said that even the CIA had announced cutbacks of 50%, and now we would all be doing our own information gathering and data entry on ourselves, in Facebook."
That's pretty frickin' funny, Seana.
Looking forward to the reading, Ade. I think.
gb
You can't back down now, Adrian. Gerard would be terribly disappointed.
I thought so, Gerard, and his delivery added a bit to the joke.
Although it's not so funny, either, the more you think about it...
I think its pretty funny too.
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