Saturday, July 24, 2010

Quantum of Suck

The movie channels have been free all this week for some reason so I've managed to catch up on half a dozen films I hadn't seen. These "reviews" are just off the cuff so it aint gonna be Pauline Kael.

1. Termination IV: Ok, I liked this. The rating on Rotten Tomatoes is 32% which is pretty disastrous, but I thought it was just fine. Sam Worthington was excellent, the story moved in a logical and straightforward way and the action was good. Christian Bale is always fun to watch and I liked McG's steal from War of the Worlds with the buckets of humans in the big machines. B-

2. Public Enemies: This went on far too long and he escaped from one prison too many but it had Johnny Depp in it and it was directed by Michael Mann. Not bad B-

3. Quantum of Solace: These guys are clearly geniuses. I mean how can you make a boring James Bond film? You've got girls, gadgets, action and yet this was an enormous yawn fest from start to finish. No, I didn't follow the plot or believe any of it. And can Daniel Craig do anything else apart from purse his lips? At one point they make an escape in an economy car and it looked like one of those Mazda ads you see around Christmas time. Too much M, too many phone conversations. Too many boring characters. He rides a motorbike like an eejit. There's no humor or chemistry. Ugh. F

4. The International: I watched this film for half hour wondering when Julia Roberts was going to show up. Clive Owen and Naomi Watts are upset about the bankers so they chase them down to Lyons (?) and he washes his face by filling a sink with bags of ice and shoving his whole head in there. Everyone mumbles a lot. Brent's boss from The Office is in it. Thats about all I can remember. C-

5. Spring Breakdown: Parker Posey's in this and Christopher Knight from the Brady Bunch. Three middle aged women go to Spring Break. That was their one idea. They had nothing else. Painful. F

6. The Day The Earth Stood Still. The original of course was one of the greatest sci-fi films of the 50's. The remake has Don Draper in it, Keanu Reeves and the lovely Jennifer Connelly. In the olden days a sci fi plot and Jennifer Connelly's eyebrows would have been enough for me but not anymore. It also proves that without Peggy Don Draper is nothing. D-