On Saturday afternoon I was at the barbershop on Barkley Street getting my hair cut. (Not for me the trendy hair places round the corner on Acland Street, and BTW, as an Irishman, I get my hair cut, not "done".) While I was in the chair a regular customer started a conversation with the barber about movies. They got to talking about Inception which my barber hated - he's a no nonsense Russian guy about 50 with a good deal of common sense. The customer was a skinny character in a leather jacket and hipster glasses and I think he mentioned the fact that he was a college professor. The customer said that my barber probably hadn't understood Inception, that it was all about Freud and was a very intelligent film and that he should probably watch it a second time. My barber said that he had understood it perfectly but was bored to tears and wouldn't watch it again in a million years.
...
I said nothing. For two reasons. Firstly because I didn't want to get worked up and secondly because although I only get a number three all over I was still getting a sensational hair cut and didn't want to ruin it. However I do have an opinion about Inception. (I haven't formally blogged about this but I have mentioned it several times in comment threads, so, if you'll please excuse the repetition...) I thought Inception was the worst kind of film: a really dumb movie masquerading as an intelligent one. Pretentious, shallow codswallop that seems to have fooled a lot of people into thinking there are hidden depths of wisdom or something. Ugh, the acting, the dreariness, the logical flaws, but my main problem with the picture was its asexuality. If Christopher Nolan had really read Freud (or if he'd been French) the movie wouldn't have been the chase and shoot em up fantasies of a 10 year old boy but would have been chock full of seduction. How about instead of a gun battle within a gun battle within a gun battle we had at least one scene where they use eroticism to convince their clients? Ellen Page is a nice young lady but she's not going to launch a thousand ships or start a war is she? And it wasn't just the casting, it was the entire ethos. Does anybody on this planet have such sterile, unerotic dreams as everyone in Inception seems to have? I'll bet even the Pope has the odd sex dream - you can't help it, you're human. It reminded me of the National Lampoon novel Bored of the Rings where the Dark Lord, instead of using the Nine Riders and brute force, hires a beautiful elf maiden to seduce the ring from Frodo...she caresses his hairy hobbit toes and he gives it to her immediately - end of story. Yes I know Nolan is English but despite the stereotype the English are a bawdy people and masters of innuendo from Chaucer to Syd James and Lily Allen.
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55 comments:
Adrian,
How come you havent talked about Bono's latest editorial for the Neu York Times.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/19/opinion/19bono.html?_r=1&ref=opinion
Jon,
I know what you're trying to do here. You're trying to get me worked up. I get it. I refuse to rise to the bait.
Its not often that I link to the Socialist Worker, however, I will do so again as this cover some but not all of my problems with Mr Hewson: Pay Your Bloody Taxes
Now please let us speak of something, anything else.
I can't comment on Inception, I slept through it...sorry.
Big props to the banjo solo, too, nicely done.
There's a bit in The Secret Policeman's Other Ball where a couple of guys come out to thank the audience for spending their money at this charitable event and one guy says it's the people in the expensive seats who've given the most and are most deserving of thanks and the other guy says, no, the people in the cheap seats have no doubt spent a much higher percentage of their wages so it's an even bigger sacrifice for them and then they both agree it's the social democrats in the middle who are the real assholes.
Douglas Adams put on the B ark.
Hollywood gives them Academy Awards.
And hey, I recognize that barber....
I usually can't be bothered with dream sequences in books or films. Just padding, I think.A whole film of padding!?
I was reminded of this gem of a scene.:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4je71Tz_9IE&feature=related
Never heard of Inception, but I'm going to take your word for it that it's no loss.
Paul- I loved "Living in Oblivion" , and Steve Buscemi is one of my fav actors. Curious about the new HBO series he's in "Boardwalk". "Trees Lounge" is a movie of his that I really loved as well.
Glenna
That was the wise course. Good move.
John
Yeah the useless B Ark people, who in the Adams version become us.
Paul
Steve Buscemi is the man. Sean beat me to it, but I was going to mention Trees Lounge. Excellent film.
Sean
You've never even heard of Inception? Were are you living, some kind of Buddhist retreat in Newfoundland?
I too am excited about Boardwalk Empire, although I was also excited by HBO's The Pacific and I felt that was pretty poor.
I am afraid your take on this is suspect,because any frequent reader here knows that what you're really doing here is kissing up to that barber.
I just looked up "Inception," on the Web and realized I had seen reviews of it on tv and wasn't impressed. I'm not a great fan of science fiction, so I'll take Glenna's lead on this, but I'll sleep through the movie without going to the theater.
What I didn't like in this post was that the "professor" wasn't taking the barber's opinion seriously, and listening to him views on their own merits, and was a bit condescending.
I'd stick with the barber.
Kathy, I believe that the barber is the real power player here. I wouldn't worry about his feelings.
Kathy
I'm about 99% certain he was a professor because he said something about "his students" and I think if he'd been a high school teacher, here in Australia he would have called them his "pupils". I agree he didn't take the barber's opinion seriously. You and I have opinions and we can disagree about things (Stieg Larsson for example) but its not a matter of life and death. I think if you're really insecure and perhaps teaching some kind of cultural studies course or something it becomes crucially important that your opinion is perceived to be the correct one.
Seana
I do value my barber. He gives you a very good, careful hair cut and he shaves you with a straight razor which you wont get in a salon will you? His magazines are good too: Top Gear, Four Four Two (a football magazine) not Esquire or Men's Health.
It's funny, but Netflix is always recommending Top Gear to me with almost five stars, and I don't even own a car.
I've seen it once or twice and it's entertaining, but not five stars worth.
Go on, say more about your barber's virtues. It never hurts to butter up the person who is holding a sharp blade near your head.
Seana
Top Gear Magazine isnt that great, but at least you know you're never going to find an ad for moisturizer.
If you're going to watch one episode of Top Gear, watch The Bolivia Special which is pretty good stuff.
I saw inception and found to be a big clotty mourning action film.
The technical work was cool but the story lacking - a common Hollywood theme. There was not an iota of unseriousness in the film. Even if you are in mourning, there are moments if even seconds where you;ll be able to find something funny and make you forget the moment, before sadness takes you over again.
But the lead guy wasn't really sad. He was just stuck in an artificially manufactured down moment posing as mourning, as though he were a robot.
Sort of like when Bono poses as an a caring intellectual, feed the poor everyman....
Anyway I was thinking throughout the movie: what if Monty Python had made its mark on the movie? I think that's the only way to deal with dumb memory layer movies. Same thing with Vanilla Sky.
Sheiler
I agree. I mean, Jesus, go to an Irish funeral sometime. It's ALL about the joke.
But I dont think I'm that funny in dreams so I forgave Nolan that to some extent, but to have such sterile asexual dreams seems weird.
I just watched Man Men: The Beautiful Girls. There is no comparison between an intelligent, emotional rich TV script for Mad Men and Christopher Nolan's Inception.
Adrian, have you read this article about Mad Men by David Hare? Good stuff.
I'm not sure what the epsode was called, but in last night's there was a great scene where a guy tried to talk Peggy into getting involved in civil rights and she said, "Most things Negroes can't do I can't do either, the University Club said the only way I'd get in is if I arrived in a cake."
John
Excellent article. Hare is a very intelligent guy and that was a nice dig against Lee Child too.
My favourite bit of The Beautiful Girls was when Sally Draper ran down the corridor and fell and all the women were united in their concern and just stood there glaring at Don and Betty for a moment. It was a gorgeous touch.
Although just when you think cinema is dead and the future is all TV something like this comes along:
Winter's Bone
Did you see it? I've heard very good things about it, but missed it in the theatre. I've also heard about Woodrell for a long time, but haven't gotten to him. Movie has given the book a little bump, though, which is nice.
Have to avoid looking at the Mad Men discussion as I am one behind.
The English are a bawdy people but they're uncomfortable with eroticism. Having said that, the sex scene in Don't Look Now was beautifully erotic and that was Nicolas Roeg, but I think most English people are more at home with one of those boring saucy postcards.
And regarding haircutting, I went into a place on Fitzroy St many years ago, asked for a No.4 and was told by the young lady with the scissors: "I'm not going to give you a haircut, I'm going to give you a hairstyle." She trimmed about a dozen hairs, rubbed in some product and charged me $80. Never again.
Well, somebody's gotta play the contrarian, so I guess that'll be me. I loved Inception from start to finish. No, it wasn't as emotionally involving as I would have liked - it never quite had as much gravitas as it thought it had - but I found it to be exciting, a lot of fun, and a wonderful example of a movie capable of sustaining suspense for longer than a few scenes. I dug how well Nolan was able to juggle, by the end, four (or five, or six?) narrative threads at the same time. It's not everyday you see a movie about corporate espionage committed through dream invasion. In that regard, I found it rather unique in a box office mired by adapted material, adapted-adapted material, sequels to sequels, more franchises, and remakes of remakes.
And I also thought it had some nice humorous moments in it too. Tom Hardy brought a wonderful English levity to his role, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt was awesome as usual, a nice cool counterpoint to Leo's angst-ridden hero who's coming apart at the subconscious seams.
I especially liked the dialog during the planning of the heist, when they talk about how ideas really take hold, through emotion as opposed to reason, and the best way to plant the seed of something in someone's head.
Last but not least, and I was surprised by this myself, I was very moved by Cillian Murphy's character arch and coming to terms with his "dad."
A lot of people have complained about the dreams not being very dream-like, but I think that's because these were manufactured dreams with specifically designed architectures. To that extent, they were supposed to be "artificial."
Go ahead everyone, bash me all you want.
Brian, I think it's safe to say that you should never attempt to get your hair cut in Australia. And is No. 3 and No 4 some kind of global barbershop code, or is this just the lingo they use down under?
I didn't see Inception, so I can't take part in the bashing, but probably wouldn't anyway. It sounds fun, and as often with this kind of stuff,and it's hard for me to tell if it really does take itself too seriously or if it's just the kind of thing that film snobs make too great claims for.
Seana, No.3 or 4 refers to the length of the guard on the blade they use when they cut a guys hair. 0 is no no guard, and the shortest, and the longest is 6 I think. It basically keeps it simple.
While we're on the topic of hair, do women get their hair "cut" or "done"?
Glenna, I figured it was something like that. Although, given that, it's hard to understand how you could go far wrong or for that matter far right as a barber.
Now, do youhappen to know why everyone has taken so easily to calling any kind of hair care potion "product"?
My thoughts exactly Seana. I think you were right when you said Adrian was just kissing up to his barber.
As for the product, we'll I could possibly dig something up, but honestly, I'd just be BSing my way though it.
Quite right on the numbers Glenna, and yes, the attraction of a buzz cut is that it's cheap and almost impossible to get wrong. $12 where I go and I bet Adrian has talked his Russian into giving him an even better deal. And that's a good point, Seana, why do they call it "product"? It's hardly specific.
I don't know if it's still the same barber he's mentioned in hushed tones before, but if so, I think it's the barber that sets the terms and conditions and not the reverse.
"Product" is indeed very sketchy. I don't think our ancestors would have accepted it being poured on their heads so blithely.
Oh, I may have to see this. Anything Cillian Murphy is in I must see.
I loved him in "The Wind that Shakes the Barley."
David
Yes but no one does perversion quite the way the English do either. Peter Greenaway comes to mind.
Smik and that other place on Acland are wildly expensive. My barber charges 15 bucks for a number three, which is a little pricey but he does a good job.
Seana
I havent seen it but I'm going to go when it opens here. It looks like my sort of thing.
The only thing I'll say about my barber is that like all artists he is sometimes a little highly strung.
Brian
How about I agree with you? I thought Tom Hardy was the best thing in picture. I loved his charm and his sense of humor and the impression that he gave that he alone wasn't taking any of this too seriously. He was the guy that kept me from walking out.
Glenna
I think women get their hair done dont they?
Kathy
I'll bet he was good in that but unfortunately I have a strict policy of not watching any Ken Loach films about Ireland.
And speaking of inappropriate eroticism, this video had me roaring:
The Count
Adrian, we do prefer to get it done, the whole treatment is always better then a simple cut. Of course, some men do to if they go for a certain style or color.
I love Ken Loach movies.
I cried through "The Wind That Shakes the Barley."
Why won't you see any of his films about Ireland? Or am I opening a can of worms here?
Don't mean to, just curious.
Uh, steering clear of the ensuing Ken Loach discussion, I am now caught up with Mad Men, and though I think this season is the most assured, I think I do probably still have the same questions about authenticity as I did in the beginning. I'm not all that impressed with David Hare's take on it. I do think it is elevated soap, and I do still think it is very artificial and mannered. It doesn't mean I don't enjoy it, but like other things receiving a great deal of hype right now, I think it's fans may claim more for it than it has really earned.
I think my constant criticism of it is that I feel like a post 2000 mentality has been imported back into those times. It's fun, but I don't think it has the depth that others claim for it.
Kathy
He's an IRA apologist of the worst type. A guilty left wing Englishman who abhores complexity or nuance in his treatment of this issue. This I got from his film Hidden Agenda when all the Protestant characters were fenian bashing nutty cariactures and the IRA men were romantic heroes driven to it by the evil Brits. This of course is no different that every other Hollywood film about Ireland...
I'd be surprised if Barley was substantially different from this well established, tedious and absurd paradigm
Well, I asked the question and it was answered.
I have a different view of Loach and love his movies, and I'll leave it at that.
Kathy
I think we can agree about the brilliance of Mr Murphy though.
... but like other things receiving a great deal of hype right now, I think it's fans may claim more for it than it has really earned.
Come on, it's not like we're talking about Rubiconhere...
Can't speak to it, John, because I stopped watching that one after five minutes.
I think I am reacting to having read Franzen's Freedom and then reading that article and just feeling that neither work is as "significant" as critics are making them out to be. In both cases, the work seems arched and distant, as if that's the only way you can comment on American culture anymore. I'm not saying there isn't a great deal of talent that's gone into them. Obviously, I'm still watching.
"In both cases, the work seems arched and distant, as if that's the only way you can comment on American culture anymore."
That's a good point. Certainly the "arched and distant" has become the most acceptable way to comment on that segment of American culture.
It does sometimes feel like we're coming towards the end of a road, there's not much more to say about our upper-middle-class in the insular way we seem to look at things.
I hope the next step is to broaden our view a little and look at more segments of "American culture" - either on their own or even better how they interact (or how they don't).
That's really what drew me to crime fiction, it's one of the only cross-class, multicultural storytelling going on these days.
And I think I'm the only person still watching Rubicon but that's only because I keep waiting for the, "Ha ha, we're only kidding," moment. In last week's episode they actually referenced Three Days of the Condor which is as dumb as me mentioning Elmore Leonard in one of my books ;)
Sorry, I meant arch, not arched. Crime fiction does seem to have a means to encounter a lot of different segments of society, and let's face it, crime is an equal opportunity employer.
It's tricky to write The Great American Novel, or TV show for that matter, because how are you really going to know enough about all aspects of society to do it. Actually the collaborative effort of television might be the best way to go about it. I guess The Wire is a good example of that, although I don't know how far outside the white middle class writers pool they went to do that one.
On Ken Loach, he's said it's only British people who have problems with his portrayal of Ireland, I don't know if Adrian above is British. Mad Men bored me.
KT
Stay out of the detective business. Read what it says on the top right hand corner of this blog.
Assumed the black Adrian was different to the blue Adrian, if you get me.
KT
I do get you. I cant figure out how to log out and then log in while keeping my user ID. I think this might be a fault with my settings or something. Or perhaps with blogger. It used to work just fine but now as soon as I leave the website and go do something else I have to log in as a new user every time. Its actually pretty annoying.
BTW Loach's masterpiece (if you've never see it, you should) is Kes.
Sounds annoying, but at least it isn't the black and blue Adrian.
Oh, "Kes" broke my heart.
I have liked all of Loach's movies, some better than others, but in one of the Irish ones, whose title shall not be named again, Cillian Murphy was the main heartbreaker. Haunted me for weeks.
Have to find some of his other movies--Murphy, that is.
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