Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Death Row Meals
10. Cap'n Crunch Cereal, Hollywood Bvd. Los Angeles. You can't get Captain Crunch in Australia for love or money. If you don't know it, it's a truly evil concoction of sweet cinnamony deliciousness that is probably banned under Article 9 of the Geneva Convention. I got my Crunch fix from a CVS on Hollywood BVD at midnight. By 12.20 the box was gone.
7. A "regular coffee," the Port Authority Bus Terminal, NYC. One of my - literal - bete noires about Australia is how wanky the coffee culture of this country is. For a nation built on a lack of pretensions and no nonsense honesty it's bizarre how their entire mindset has been captured by the latte/cappuccino/espresso bollocks. You can't get a cup of black coffee anywhere in Australia, instead you must ask for a "long black" which is espresso with hot water added. This is somehow classier than brewed black coffee. It tastes vile, costs three dollars, comes in a tiny cup and takes forever to arrive. In America it was a joy to get a decent black coffee anywhere and in New York City I loved getting a "regular coffee" i.e. with lots of cream and lots of sugar for about a buck in every diner, fast food joint and cafe, including the bowels of the Port Authority Bus Terminal. There the "regular coffee" had the ideal blend of sweetnees, creaminess and acrid bitterness. I had it with a bear claw. Bloody marvellous.
6. Chipotle Carnitas Burrito. The Chipotle chain is not really the home of my burrito of choice but its a good substitute when you're looking for a half decent burrito in a big city. The carnitas (pork) burrito is free range and delicious when you get the guac, extra hot salsa, rice, beans and cheese (no sour cream).
5. A chocolate milkshake, the Hard Rock Cafe, Los Angeles. I had never been in a Hard Rock Cafe before and I doubt whether I'll ever be in one again. Its kind of a pricey establishment with dodgy musical memorabilia on the walls and the food is only fair, but oh Jesus the milkshakes! Malt, milk, ice cream, chocolate, whipped cream. A heart attack in a glass and utterly fabulous.