Friday, October 14, 2011

A Rare Guy Moment

I was at the Safeway supermarket in St Kilda the other night getting some supplies. Normally I'm there with my two daughters or my two daughters and my wife. But on this particular night I was on my own. I could buy anything I wanted but the question Mick Jagger posed all those years ago was what did I need. I was momentarily dazzled by all the choices and the lack of children fighting and screaming near by. It was very much like that bit in The Hurt Locker. You do see single guys in the Safeway and they're all of a type. They never have baskets or carts and they do not have a shopping list or a plan. They cover a lot of territory moving from aisle to aisle and then back to the aisle they were just at a moment ago. If they can't find something they give up rather than ask for help. Women seem to have plans and shopping carts and an iron will and they move through the supermarket with ruthless efficiency like Rommel's Panzers in the eastern desert in early 1942. I wandered aimlessly for a while and I almost got a coffee cake but it had no bar code on it and I didn't want any kind of an incident at the checkout where they have to speak into the microphone and they hold up the coffee cake for everyone to see. So, anyway, coming out of the Safeway I found that I had purchased a large frozen pizza and a bottle of tequila. I think this is a classic guy move. I don't see many women walking home through the park with a frozen pizza and a bottle of tequila. Women passing by very much gave me a pitying sort of look but the men knew. Yes, the men knew. It was like that secret male code they talk about in Spaced.